Smoking Anxiety and Optics Planet Holiday Gala

Yesterday was an interesting and challenging day for me. As I started my drive to work in the morning, on my THIRD day without a cigarette, I felt the anxiety welling up in me. We had the Optics Planet Holiday Gala to attend last night, and you will usually run into me outside with the smokers! It was like I couldn't figure out what I was going to do if I couldn't hang with peeps that I am used to hangin’ with. I called my punky’s phone and left him a message, just as every other morning while going to work, except this one had an anxiety freak alarm all over it! When Steven called me a bit later to leave me a message, as he always does, he talked me off the ledge and helped better prepare my mind for the NO SMOKING evening ahead.

My honey pie arrived home to pick me up for the party, with much encouragement and a positive attitude! As we were driving, I realized that this would be the first Optics Planet function that we have attended since Steven started his chemotherapy back in April. Then I started thinking how nice it is going to be to see so many people that I haven’t seen for a while. Also knowing that many of them already knew about my lung cancer diagnosis, and have already started praying for me brought a big smile to my heart and eased the anxiety. 

We arrived at Bristol Court Banquet Hall in Mount Prospect, IL to begin the evening of fun, food, and friends. As we worked our way from the coat check area into the banquet hall, we were greeted with huge smiles and encouraging hugs. We then decided on the table in the corner where a few friends were already staking claim. Then it was time to take the journey around the room and say hi to all the familiar faces and be introduced to the newer ones. I don’t recall a time when I have ever been hugged so much, and so meaningfully, encouraging, and tightly! I have known since my diagnosis that many people are praying for me, and want to do anything they can to help, but the knowledge can never replace the sincere sentiments and uplifting words or the feeling of being cared for deeply by many. Now that is truly priceless! My honey was glued to my side for support. He had decided earlier at home, that he would not be drinking this evening, which put me even more at ease.

The night was filled with a full spread of delicious food, good music, and lots of laughter, fun, and games. I don’t believe I mentioned the theme this year was “White Nights” and everyone was to wear white. The whole room was decorated in white and looked amazing. 

I didn't really participate too much in the fun and games this time, but I did raise my hand to pick a box, though I was clueless on what was going on! Now I know it was the “Vendor Mystery Briefcase” game. When Kayla called me to pick a box, I was tickled pink! I whispered in my honey’s ear, which box he thought I should pick and he said “Browning”. I probably shouldn't have bothered him, I already had my eye on the “Leatherman” box, and that was the one I chose.

Then I got to take it up on stage to open it…suspense….I won! I won a cash prize of $50.00! Whoooo hooo! Still don’t know how the whole game is/was played, but hey, I am fifty bucks richer and that works for me. 

We kind of snuck out earlier than normal, but it was already a full day for both of us, since it was a week night and we both worked yesterday. The drive home was nice, for 11:00pm on a Friday night. It hit Steven that neither of us had taken pictures. Not unusual for me not to think about it, but it surprised both of us that my punky didn’t. I quietly thanked God for the grace he provided to get me through without cigarette anxiety, and for the many people who care about me and are praying for me.

~John 14:27

“I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid”.